A mother told me a rumor was circulating around school that her daughter was pregnant, so the mom considered sending her to a different school. It turns out the daughter, herself, started the rumor. Abandoned by her dad when this girl was three, she had a habit of doing things to seek attention. She was "the odd student out" in the youth group, the one others shied away from. She believed nobody could love her.
That's one of many lies today's young women believe.
While mentoring one on one, counseling, and traveling to speak and teach, I've been grieved to discover that we as women can believe many lies about ourselves that affect our marriages and our children's spiritual identity. There is so much "head-knowledge," yet no "heart-knowing." What's the disconnect?
As I prayed and tried to find reasons why women are susceptible to lies, I discovered one study that reported 70-80 percent of Christian youth are leaving the church after they are on their own. This statistic shook me. Without the foundational truth of Scripture and a supportive community of believers to guide and grow young women into faithful adults, this generation faces a slippery slope. As a result of these findings, three years ago my husband and I chose to start True ID Conferences. We take our message around the country, and, using interactive learning and hands-on activities, we help teen and college-age women discover who they are in Christ. As we've interacted with young women, we've discovered messages they tend to believe from the world and the media:
"I was a mistake," one girl wrote. "I shouldn't be here."
Another wrote, "[I'm] not pretty enough, not smart enough, not skinny enough. I will never find a husband who will love me for who not what I am."
My heart broke as I read more:
- I deserved to be abused. I needed to cause myself pain.
- I believe my dad does not love me, that his girlfriend is more important.
- I don't feel anything.
- My sin will never be forgotten. Love is only conditional on the good things I do. If I mess up, God won't love me.
- I'll never measure up.
- I thought I had to be someone else for people to like me. I thought I had to conform.
- I belong in darkness.
- Drugs will cure you. Satan is better than God. No one cares about me.
Why the lies? The Baucham study reveals that more than 80 percent of teens who claim to be born again do not believe in the existence of absolute truth. Additionally, 63 percent don't believe Jesus is the Son of the one true God.