It Takes a Community to Sustain a Marriage

Community doesn’t have to be formal, but it should be intentional.

A marriage community is also different from church. A church congregation is a body that gathers to learn, worship, and serve. Most churches, large and small, have recognized the importance of developing small groups apart from worship. Community invites people into your life and your marriage. It asks you to both give and receive far more personally than attending church.

Why Community Is Important for Your Marriage

If someone was reading this article 100 years ago, they might think it strange to encourage community. For most of human existence, community was embedded in the fabric of life. Generations of families lived in the same small town or village, depending upon each other for economic, emotional, and physical survival. Whether you wanted it or not, you had community. Other women passed on marriage and parenting advice and were probably quite involved in everyone else’s personal business.

We live in a strange time in which you can live your entire adult life without community. You don’t have to meet your neighbors or introduce yourself to anyone at church. Chances are you live hundreds of miles away from relatives and have moved away from childhood and college friends. You and your husband can live life on your own little “island,” inviting the occasional friend for a visit.

I believe this lack of community is one of the greatest threats to marriage today. Community accomplishes three important safeguards for your marriage:

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Juli Slattery

Juli Slattery is a TCW regular contributor and blogger. A widely known clinical psychologist, author, speaker, and broadcast media professional, she co-founded Authentic Intimacy and is the co-author of Passion Pursuit: What Kind of Love Are You Making?

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May 25

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