In November 2009, Johanna found out she was expecting triplets. Her first pregnancy, it was a time of joy and excitement for Johanna and her husband. Johanna is a delivery nurse and enjoys being a part of bringing babies into the world. But her pregnancy suddenly became a journey of trusting God in uncertainty when in early February, 13 weeks into her pregnancy, Johanna’s water broke.
When it happened, Johanna wasn’t exactly sure what was going on. “[The doctor] didn’t think it was even possible for your water to break that early. So I just went home and did what I [normally] did,” Johanna explains. It wasn’t until the ultrasound two weeks later that she found out one of the triplets, the one she and her husband had named Nathan, didn’t have enough amniotic fluid.
The news hit hard. “I just remember being in shock and not really believing what was going on. I mean, I knew better. I knew that meant that baby’s not going to live,” Johanna describes. “I guess I didn’t even let myself think about that at the time.” She sat in the doctor’s office, numb, listening to their options. First, they could see what would happen. It would be a risk to keep her babies, because Nathan could possibly die in utero, in which case his identical twin, Noah, only had a 25 percent chance of survival. This option was grim, but Johanna couldn’t begin to consider the alternative: “terminate and start over.”1