Surviving an Affair

God can bring blossoms of joy out of the dirt of your despair.
Surviving an Affair

On August 12, 1988, my husband, Patrick, confessed he'd committed adultery.

His revelation was as unbelievable as if someone had told me the moon had fallen from the sky. The man who told me he'd lived a secret life of sexual sin seemed so different from the man to whom I'd been married for nine years.

My rage, disillusionment, and confusion were intense. Yet Pat was so broken, so willing to do whatever it took to break free from his sexual addiction, that despite my anger and hurt, I agreed to go through counseling with him.

There came a moment during counseling when I thought our marriage would end. I was five months pregnant, and we had a four-year-old daughter. Our counselor sat with me one night and said, "Connie, you have to accept the possibility Patrick might not break free." That was the worst night of my life. It was only my confidence in God that gave me the courage to hold on.

But as the months went by, Pat found the strength to change, and our marriage was slowly, painfully restored. I discovered I needed God's grace as much as Pat did. And I had to choose—with God's help—to remember that if God could forgive Pat's wrongs, I could, too. Today, almost 11 years after Pat's confession, thanks to God's love and power, our life together is better than ever before.

Member access onlyYou have reached the end of this Article Preview
To continue reading, join now for free and get complete access.
orJoin Now for Free

Read more articles that highlight writing by Christian women at

Free CT Women Newsletter

Sign Up For Our weekly Newsletter CT's weekly newsletter to help women grow their marriage and family relationships through biblical principles.

Read These Next

  • Related Issue
    How to Throw a Dinner PartyMember Access Only
    This holiday season, you and your spouse can host a memorable evening for your friends — and enjoy it, too.
  • Editor's Pick
    Stop Being So "Helpful" at Work
    Stop Being So "Helpful" at WorkMember Access Only
    What to do when male colleagues automatically assume you’ll take the notes, make the coffee, and plan the office party


Join in the conversation on Facebook or Twitter

Follow Us

More Newsletters