Through the years, many of the conflicts I've heard in my counseling office have focused on money.
"I never know how much money we have because he won't let me see the checkbook." "All I ask is that she record the checks she writes. Balancing our checkbook is a nightmare." These are the kind of verbal spears couples throw at each other when they can't agree.
Most of our financial conflicts have nothing to do with how much money we have but rather our attitudes toward money and how we handle it. Here are some ways to make sure money is an asset rather than a liability to your marriage.
Gain a biblical perspective
The first step is to get a biblical perspective. Jesus said, "A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions" (Luke 12:15). Many couples fail to take Jesus' words seriously. Instead, they act on the belief that more money will solve their problems.
No amount of money will make life meaningful. Life's meaning is found in our relationships—first with God, then with our spouse and family, and finally with others.
When we allow money to overly influence our decisions, we're likely to make poor ones. I remember the husband who said, "I moved my family halfway across the country against my wife's wishes. My motivation was a $50,000 salary increase. Two years later, my daughter is into drugs and my son's joined a religious cult. I've spent more money trying to rescue them than my increased salary."1