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When Friendships Go too Far

When Friendships Go too Far

Guarding against emotional affairs
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I was in complete awe of how God's words were romancing my heart. That void in my heart was gone; it was full of him. I continued to sit, humbled by his presence and his words to me.

God Will Be Your Husband

One of the most fascinating word images God has used to reveal himself is ish—meaning "husband." This name for God is found, for example, when God describes himself as Israel's husband in Hosea 2:16, 19-20 and in Isaiah 54:5-8. God wants us to look to him first and fill our needs with his time and his Word. Though in our eyes, a marriage is considered a promise between two people, it takes three to make it work. The third person is God.

"I will be your Ish. I will give you the intimacy you crave, the romance you long for. For I created you, and only the Master can make you complete. I gave you the longing for attention because I want to fulfill it. I want to love you more than any man can here on this earth. I know the depths of your heart, the longing in your soul, and the need to be completely loved. Only I can love and cherish you in a way that is inexhaustible. I want to pursue your heart, to prize it. All others will forsake you, yes, even the man I placed by your side will not love you as much as I will. Just remember that I created you. I alone am completely captivated by the depth of your beauty, every heartbeat, every thought, and every breath you take. Even the scars you bear. I love you so deeply and know you so intimately that there is no end of me and no beginning of you. Even when you wander, I will be here waiting, ready to embrace you."

Imagine the God of the universe telling you that he loves you and is captivated by you. God wants to fill the emptiness in our hearts that no one else can fill.

God changed my marriage when he showed me the deep love he has for me, regardless of my mistakes. I am so humbled at his mercy. God wants to make it perfectly clear to us that we are never alone. His presence is ever with us, his words ever ready to speak to our hearts. He fills the lonely places in our hearts.

How to Protect Your Marriage

After I broke all communication with John and turned to God with my loneliness, I examined my actions and took steps to protect my marriage. Here are a few things I learned, which may benefit your marriage as well.

Five-Minute Rule

  • When I see male friends or acquaintances, I do not spend more than five minutes talking to them in public unless my husband is with me. Even if I run into my friend at Wal-mart, I limit communication. Just because my friend may be a godly man, doesn't mean he isn't prone to temptation.

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Displaying 1–3 of 6 comments


February 07, 2013  11:24am

My husband and I have chosen to share our Facebook account, so everything can be seen by both of us and people know if they write to us, we both see it. As with everything, a good thing can be used for evil, or it can be used for a great good.

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December 04, 2012  9:47am

When an old friend and former boss was caught in an affair, my eyes were opened! I realized how close I could have come to such a mistake! Everyone loved this guy, including me. I am so grateful to God that he protected me and gave me boundaries in my work relationships. Women who must work outside the home really are at such risk. Of necessity we must interact with kind and attractive men who appear powerful and protective....exactly what we want our husbands to be! We have to guard against comparing our spouse to others and remember what attracted us to them in the first place. Oh yes, and consider the collateral consequences of an affair to our family, church and friends if we end up in sin!

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December 02, 2012  9:53pm

i did not know until i was about a third of the way through this that this was for women ( a friend sent me the link). This is really timely because an elder at our church said that Facebook should be off limits for everyone in the church! i am thankful that God has answered our prayer and let us know that we do not need to get rid of Facebook, but learn and manifest God's purpose for it. Thank you. Thank you.

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