"I don't think any woman ever envisions herself a single mom," Angela Thomas, author of My Single—Mom Life (Thomas Nelson), candidly admits. Angela, 45, is a well-known speaker and author who holds a master's degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. The mom of four-Taylor, 17, Grayson, 14, William, 12, and AnnaGrace, 10—Angela's been divorced for more than six years. Here, she gives readers a firsthand look at the challenges—and blessings—of being a single mom.
Before your divorce, did you harbor any misperceptions about single moms?
Divorce carries such judgment in the church. I'm sure years ago I judged others the way I've occasionally been judged as a divorced mom.
I didn't fully understand the lives of so many women around me. And I definitely didn't realize the loneliness of that life, the difficulty of parenting alone, or the lost feeling of not being able to lean on anyone. When you solo-parent, no one's coming home to take over. No one's there to bounce ideas off, cover your back, or reinforce your decisions. There's no one to hold you through a tough choice and whisper, "I know you're worn out; I'll handle this."
I've learned to avoid making decisions—about spending, dating, or relocating—out of loneliness. I've also learned some good news about loneliness: It won't kill me—even though at times I feel it might.
I love to tell other single moms, "Receive the lessons loneliness wants to teach."1