I am a woman familiar with loneliness. I was lonely as a single child. I was lonely as a teenager trying to find my way. I was lonely when I first went to college. I was lonely during my broken engagement. I was lonely while I was living in my difficult marriage. And I have been especially lonely since my divorce.
Loneliness can sweep over me and hang over my shoulders like a weight. A sad, sad weight that reminds me I am alone and truly on my own. Interestingly, this feeling of loneliness can happen just moments after I’ve been with my best friends for a girls’ night out or while my kids are in the next room.
We live in a coupled-up world. And those of us who’ve been used to coupledom—even if it were in a strained, emotionally un-intimate relationship—can find ourselves a bit lost, scrambling to fill in the silences and the holes in our schedule.
Jesus Isn't My Boyfriend
As I get older and experience more of what life can throw at me, I’ve realized more and more that I have no idea what people are feeling when they’re going through something I’ve never gone through. That’s why I cringe when a married person (or even simply a non-divorced person) attempts to encourage me in my loneliness with the statement that God should be my everything, implying that I, therefore, should not be lonely.
Now, Jesus is a lot of things to me—a lot of things. I believe Jesus is real—that he lived, that he died, and that he came back to life. And I believe he didn’t just die a normal death, but that he died on a cross to pay for my sin. I believe Jesus is my Savior.1