Jen Hatmaker: What I've Learned from Turning 40

The gains far outweigh the losses
Jen Hatmaker: What I've Learned from Turning 40
Image: MILLANN / SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

Sometimes life sneaks up on you, and then you’re left wondering, How did I get here? I thought I was supposed to be better at everything by now! So for everyone that needs a reality check, I’m sharing a bit of what I’ve learned from turning 40.

1. Aging Isn’t All Bad

There are losses, for sure, but the gains of turning 40? They’re huge. The gains outpace the losses ten to one. I love being 40 because of how I feel in my own skin, how I feel in my own brain, how I feel in my own marriage, and how I feel in my own place and my own calling. I know me now. I know what God has made me to do. I know what I am gifted at. At this point I can say, I know that I am good at X, Y, Z and terrible at A, B, C. And that’s okay. Ten years ago I wanted to be good at everything, and now I am just more sure about what I’m here for, and I’m more comfortable running my race in confidence without issuing apologies and regrets all the time.

And all my relationships are better. All of them. They’re all deeper. My marriage is deeper, and my friendships are deeper. I have friendships that have spanned 20–25 years. They are so rich, and there is so much goodness. My relationship with my parents is as good as it’s ever been. I love being a grownup kid of my parents. My siblings and I have weathered 20 years of adulthood together. So I look across the landscape of my relationships at 40, and I think, These are so rich and so good because of all of these years that I have within them. So if this is how I feel at 40, I cannot wait to see how I feel about all my people at 60.

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Aging; Identity; Insecurity
Today's Christian Woman, October 14, 2015
Posted October 14, 2015

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